(Katie) This last month has been quite the whirlwind. I finished my first year of Graduate School, completing 3 final papers and 1 final project. 600 students checked out of our Residence Hall. I said goodbye to 12 RAs. Wrote 43 fines and 36 work requests. Reflected on the year with 6 GRAs and 3RDs. We hosted 7 members of James' wonderful family. Celebrated Brian's college graduation. Spent 5 days in San Antonio to celebrate the beautiful wedding of my middle sister Ali to John Boone.
So much life has occurred in the last 3 weeks. There is much to celebrate and give God thanks for, yet I feel emotionally numb. Too many transitions in a short period of time. My heart cannot keep up.
My theme for the Summer is to cultivate a quiet heart- a heart at rest, trusting in God. One of the perks of Residence Life is a month and a half of paid vacation in the Summer. My prayer is that this external rhythm of rest will become an internal reality.
When I reflect on my heart's posture throughout the last 3 weeks, I am reminded of an image of Jesus, asleep during a raging storm. How could He? My heart's posture resonates much more with the disciples in this story who are terrified, fearful, and overwhelmed. Jesus slept in the calm assurance that His Father was in control. Even in the midst of good things, my heart can still doubt that God is actually in control of all the pieces. Does God actually care about what I need in these circumstances?
Cultivating a quiet heart begins with immersing ourselves in God's love. Jesus' unbroken intimacy with God's love enabled Him to keep a quiet heart. Jesus experienced the heart of the Father. Jesus could be at rest because he knew from personal experience that God was attentive to his needs.
Like the numbers in the first paragraph, so often I got focused on my circumstances. We are subjects to the vicissitudes and necessities of the world, causing us to become disquieted. The secret to a quiet heart is not a different set of circumstances. It is to focus on Christ in me amidst the circumstances of my life.
Lord, give me a quiet heart.
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