He who walks with the wise grows wise
Proverbs 13:20
Anamchara is Gaelic, the language of the Celtic lands, and when translated means "soul friend." This concept was distinctive in early Celtic Christianity, particularly in the monastic life, where every monk was assigned to an older brother in the community to walk the journey of faith with.
So what exactly is a soul friend? Edward Sellner says that "to be a soul friend is to provide a place of sanctuary to another, where through our acceptance, love, and hospitality, he or she can grow in wisdom, and both of us in depth."
What a beautiful definition. I would like to further unpack some of the words and celebrate specific people in our life who God has used in 2010 to be "soul friends" to us. While James and I have been richly blessed with incredible families (and James is also a Lindstedt) and community, I wanted to specifically honor the faithfulness of specific friends in this past season.
Sanctuary
Friends who provide a sanctuary, where the worst parts of ourselves can be acknowledged so that genuine change can occur are an eternal treasure. I would describe these friends as skilled listeners who, by their very nature and character, communicate a sense of safety and trustworthiness. Their presence is disarming and our walls can easily come down.
I would like to honor Ann and Michael Swindell as friends who have provided a sanctuary for James and I. Since moving to Wheaton in July, the Swindells have faithfully discipled James and I. They are an incredible example of a godly marriage, a couple who wholeheartedly pursues Jesus in all areas of their lives. God has used them to help guide James and I in laying a rock solid foundation in our 5 month old marriage. Ann has the heart of a pastor and is a woman of immense wisdom. She has been steadfast in teaching and challenging me to REST (which I am awful at) and provides a refuge for me to bring brokenness into the light. Michael is apostolic, sees who James is in the Lord, and boldly calls that out in my husband. Michael sharpens James and I've been blessed to reap the fruits of their friendship. Ann and Michael, you are an answer to prayer!
I would also like to honor Katie Welna and Matt Horne. Both Katie and Matt have faithfully covered James and I in prayer throughout our relationship and marriage. James and I covet their prayers as both of them pray in a powerful way that declares on "earth as it is in Heaven." God has given both of them the gift of FAITH and they have encouraged James and I to look at difficult circumstances through the eyes of faith.
Love and Acceptance
Tracy Balzer describes soul friends as those who "recognize the image of God in you."
I would like to honor Vivian Klebs. While living in Zambia, I started praying for a mentor (in MN) who would see me like the Father did. God faithfully answered that prayer in Vivian. She is a mighty woman of God and I am blessed to call her my spiritual mom. She carries the love of the Father and has steadfastly called out Christ in me. As someone who struggles with self-doubt, Vivian's voice of LOVE has consistently spoken the Truth about who God says that I am and I've started to believe it. Vivian is more committed to my destiny than I am. Words don't do her justice, but her presence in my life is of profound significance.
I would also like to honor the Edisons (as of March 4th)....Rachel and Nathaniel. Rachel and I have a "Naomi and Ruth" friendship...we journey together, meeting each other in our deepest places. As a couple, Nathaniel and Rachel always call James and I back to the Truth of who God says we are when we start to waiver. Before James and I even realize that we are wavering, the phone rings and its the Edisons who have been praying and are all over it! They quickly and boldly call us back to the hold the line. They are also friends who help us to honor our marriage, helping James and I to see each other as God does when we are frustrated with one another. James and I are excited for 2011 and all that God has for our friendship and future ministry!
Trisha (AP): She and I met through a random small group last year in MN but she has faithfully showed the love of God to me through her constant JOY and encouragement. Too often jealousy creeps into female friendships (and let me tell you, there is a lot I could be jealous of with her) and I am grateful that this friendship is a safe place where we are mutually able to celebrate one another and the amazing things that God is doing in our lives. AND, no one makes me laugh more!
Truth
Soul friends are also those who create a haven where truth can be spoken in love.
Brotha Trev has been an incredible friend to James (and I) and has modeled this attribute extremely well. Trevor is perhaps the most joyful person that I know and he has spoken a lot of truth to my husband over this year.
I am also grateful for DF and for guiding me through an intense, yearlong inward journey to look at a lot of things in myself that I was fearful to see. However, I persevered thanks to his constant reassurance and encouragement. As a gifted listener, DF spoke truth through asking me profound questions about where I was finding my identity, specifically in areas that weren't actually built on Christ. Furthermore, God used him as an instrument of restoration and reconciliation in our family and I am grateful for his guidance.
K. Dove: Permission granted! Since moving to Wheaton, God has used K. Dove to speak profound truth into my life...stroke punch, stroke punch (thank you group projects). She has become a trusted confident within Residence Life and I am grateful for her friendship!
James and I are rich in soul friends and we count them as some of our greatest blessings. We all need a "tribe" of people to journey with us through life. As 2010 comes to a close, I encourage you to take time to reflect on the "soul friends" in your tribe who have blessed you. Let them know of their impact before 2010 comes to a close!
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