Compassioning

(Katie) 

Prior to getting married and working in Residence Life, I would have told you that I am a compassionate, empathetic person. Even Stregnthsfinder confirmed it to be one of my top strengths. However, through taking Care and Counsel, struggling to enter into the suffering of some of my students, and being invited to look into the mirror that my husband holds up to me, I've learned that I am not that compassionate and I've lived 26 years of life without actually understanding what it means.

The word compassion generally evokes positive feelings. I like to think of myself as a compassionate person who is basically good, gentle, and understanding. I often assume that compassion is a natural human response to human suffering. 

The word compassion is derived from the Latin words pati and cum, which together mean "to suffer with." Compassion asks us to go where it hurts, to enter into places of pain, to share in brokenness, fear, confusion, and anguish. Compassion requires us to be weak with the weak, vulnerable with the vulnerable, and powerless with the powerless. Compassion means full immersion.
  
God has gently revealed to me that I often resist entering actively into suffering with others. While I am initially willing to listen to others' pain and extend care, if the problem isn't quickly fixed, my natural response when confronted with pain is unfortunately anger instead of care, irritation instead of sympathy, and fury instead of compassion. Yuck! If compassion is actually entering into suffering, it becomes clear that something more is involved than a general kindness or tenderness. I think that when we are honest with ourselves, compassion is neither our central concern or our primary stance in life. Instead, we maintain a safe distance from others because we do not actually want to suffer with them.

     
 Where does this anger derive from? Nouwen suggests that this reaction comes from  the person who says, "When I can't do anything about it anyhow, why do you bother me with it." Confronted with human pain, the truth is that we are reminded of our powerlessness, in that we can't fix it. The reality of my powerlessness makes me feel offended and anger becomes my defense mechanism. 

How can we creatively respond to Jesus' call to be compassionate as your loving God is compassionate? How can we make God's compassion the basis and source of our lives?

I don't have any answers, just a couple reflections. First, I think we need to be reminded that becoming more sensitive, perceptive, and compassionate is not the outcome of our striving and hard work, but is the fruit of God's grace. Secondly, entering into suffering requires patience. True patience is not passive waiting. The Greek word for patience is hyomone which is translated as endurance, perseverance, and fortitude. Patience involves staying with it, living it through, listening carefully to what presents itself here and now. Patience is "the compassionate way that leads to the compassionate life" (Nouwen). Finally, although we often use compassion as an adjective or noun, we need to change our mindsets and start using it as a verb. We must  shift from being compassionate people to compassioning others. True compassion requires radical action and is always present tense! When I read Philippians 2, we see that our compassionate God in Jesus Christ divested himself from all distinctions and "became as we are" (v.6). Jesus did not stay in heaven removed from our suffering, but became us. He suffered our fears, uncertainties, and anxieties with us. Jesus gave up his privileged position and emptied himself. We are called to leave our privileged positions of comfort and enter into the suffering of others.

The Fifty Nifty

"Probably the most bold, creative, inspiring and generous business pursuit since Venture Expeditions." - James (Venture Expeditions was the organization that I traveled to Africa with, raising $10,000 for Child Restoration Outreach of Mbale Uganda while climbing Mt Kilimanjaro)


Our good friends and wedding photographers Jonny and Michelle a.k.a. Paper Antler are embarking on something you will want to be a part of or at least follow over the next year.

Beginning January 2012, Michelle and I will embark on a year long adventure, with the goal of photographing 50 weddings in 50 states in 50 weeks donating $1,000 from each wedding to She Dances for a total donation of $50,000.    

She Dances is an anti-human trafficking organization that we have worked closely with over the years.  The $50,000 raised through the Fifty Nifty would assist She Dances in sustaining their current safe home in Honduras for one year or allow them to open a new safe home in another place of need.  

We need your help to spread the word about the Fifty Nifty, so If you feel so inclined, please forward this email onto everyone you know.  Check out our promo video below and the .pdf attached for more info and to see when we'll be passing through your city.  We'll also be updating our blog regularly with bookings and other news regarding the Fifty Nifty so check back often! 

Hope to see you on the road!

Excitedly,

Jonny + Michelle

ps:  Although our ideal would be to photograph 50 weddings in 50 states in 50 weeks to raise $50,000 for She Dances and to follow the itinerary shown in our video, our primary objective is to raise $50,000 for She Dances in 50 weeks.  If you would like to book us to photograph your wedding and we aren't in the right geographic location at the time of your wedding, contact us anyway. We might be able to work something out.  For example, we probably could be convinced to spend an extra week in Hawaii during December.

6 reasons that I am truly blessed by Katie

(James) There is no question in my mind that I am not the most blessed man in the world to have married the woman I did. Every day we grow closer to one another and share more deeply and richly from the deep wells of our souls. As we grow in love, respect, trust and peace, we become more free to appreciate the other person for all that they truly are. I am learning that I am so absolutely dependent on the love and grace of both God and Katie.

These are just 6 reasons in which Katie has been an amazing wife to me.

1. Servant Heart - This woman isn't afraid to get dirty. Whether she is dusting our perpetually dust-ridden apartment, cleaning the many dishes from the host of students that we love to entertain, washing laundry or running errands, Katie is always serving. The household chores are just the beginning; Katie is always considering me and my day, where I am at emotionally, physically and spiritually. She is daily asking me what I need most, to relax and watch a movie, to get outside, to have some time alone, or to talk and process. All of this she does from a place of wanting to serve and love me well. I could go on about the times she has made me breakfast, lunch or dinner, woken up early to bring me to work or ran to the post office when I didn't have the chance. We are absolutely strengthened in our marriage by Katie's constant servant heart.

2. Listening Ear - Katie is the best listener that I have ever met. If you spend even a half hour with Katie, you will probably find that she asks really good questions. She is one of the most natural counselors that I have ever met. Even when I don't feel that I need to be drawn out, she will usually find something within my heart that unlocks a whole wellspring of insight or revelation regarding myself or our relationship. I can honestly say that I feel so very known by Katie. Her listening ear is therapeutic to my soul.

3. Playful Spirit - Hands down I have never laughed as hard as I have since meeting Katie. "Who knew that I married a comedian" is something I often find myself saying. Katie is a goof, she is playful, witty and really really funny. She finds humor in the most grim situations. Every day I feel more and more free to be me as I realize that Katie loves who "me" is. I can sing in my falsetto and she usually joins right in with her show choir voice and should-a-been-on-Broadway songs. I can be grabby and Katie finds a way to point it out in a way that I end up smiling. Laughter is truly good medicine and it is so good to call my wife my friend, truly.

4. Profound Counsel - Although the pressure is often times put on the man to figure things out and be capable of leading, I find myself relying more and more on Katie's wise counsel, not only in personal matters, but relational matters too. As we continue to navigate the direction of our life together I long more and more to know what my wife thinks. I feel as though I usually fail to let her know how much her counsel means to me, but hopefully she will read this. Whether matters regarding my place of employment, family matters, ministry, friendships or finances... Katie has SO MUCH to bring to the table. Praise the Lord it isn't all on me.

5. Encouraging Voice - I have never met someone that is equally as encouraging and positive. She is like positive and uplifting Christian radio - except much less corny with a whole lot more variety. If I find a penny on the side of the road she will throw me a party to celebrate. Truly I feel as though my smallest accomplishments and hard work do not go unnoticed. Although I historically tend to be retched when it comes to thank yous (I didn't send out thank you letters for my graduation presents) she is teaching me what it is to be intentional with giving people praise and encouragement. And when things aren't looking so good, Katie is steadfast and hope-evoking. Her words are light in dark places. She is my best friend when I can be my own worst enemy.

6. Devoted Desire - There is something about a wife that just loves and desires you that makes the heart of a man explode. Katie is the most honoring and faithful wife a man could imagine. Whether carrying around a picture of me on her phone, leaving a voice mail greeting for everyone to hear "If this is my husband, I LOVE YOU!", posting pictures of us all over facebook, our blog, and our apartment, the girl loves me and isn't afraid to let people know. She has been instrumental in reassuring me in my times of self doubt and fear of abandonment. I have, in large ways overcome those fears and I have to attribute much of that growth to her devoted desire. God shows his love and desire for me through my wife and that desire is inspiring. There are few things that a man wouldn't do for that kind of wife.

So here is to 6 months and to my Bride! 

6 Months

(James) 6 months might not seem like a landmark for many people or for most relationships, however today truly stands as a landmark for Katie and me...

The profound thing that I have found about relationships through our open and honest dialogue with other couples is that what most people see on the surface is only a fraction of what actually exists within the hearts and homes of those individuals. Over the past few months we have heard countless stories from other couples that reveal the trials, seasons, challenges and struggles that every relationship has had to go through in order to be where they are today. Without fail, every couple has struggled.

I can honestly say that in preparing for my marriage I was expecting there to be trials. Yet I have found that you never really understand until you've been there. It's like gearing up for an endurance race or challenge. Although you know that it is going to be hard, your preconceived notions of what it will be like pale in comparison to those grueling moments in the race in which you are literally telling yourself, "This was probably the worst idea that I have ever had. I honestly feel as if I am going to keel over and die if I take one more step. I know without a doubt that this is the worst pain that I have ever endured." The thoughts, as irrational as they may be, seem ever so real in the moment. Don't they?

God gave Katie and I the verse from Ephesians 3:17 which references the concept of being "Rooted and Established in God's love." Sounds pretty enough right? Love... tree images... what could be so hard about that. The process of becoming "Rooted" has proven to be so much more stretching and trying than I could have ever imagined. Maybe it is because I am a severely broken man and need that much refinement, maybe it is because I have such high expectations, perhaps it is because I have a calling on my life that will require so much internal and inter-personal work before I will be able to steward it all.

In praying for our next six months, God continues to give me the word Establish. As much as I was holding out for "movetoafrica", "drummingforhillsong", "professionalskiministry", or "sailthegreekisles" God finds it suitable and wonderful to give us the word Establish. The good news is that much of the ground work has begun. The "Rooting" process is well underway and for the first time, Katie and I are getting to lay some foundations. Katie shared this verse with me last week. Isaish 28:16 "Therefore, this is what the Sovereign LORD says: "Look! I am placing a foundation stone in Jerusalem, a firm and tested stone. It is a precious cornerstone that is safe to build on. Whoever believes need never be shaken." The foundation, being Christ is also the same foundation that He wants to build within us. And once the foundation is secure, the building can begin, and the building, I am sure, brings forth so much hope and joy. If you have ever seen or have been a part of a house building project, it isn't until the first wall is up that a structure actually looks like something.

And so in this next season, as God begins to establishing upon his firm foundation, I eagerly anticipate seeing the first signs of growth; the first bit of green rising through the surface of the soil and the first wall rising from the ground. Within both Katie and I, we have a sense that what is to come is greater than what either of us can imagine and more incredible than what our small beginnings might hint at. If the size of the roots are any indication of what is to grow out of us... then watch out world.

Fulfillment

(Katie) I LOVE Sabbath. My husband treated me to a breakfast date at Honey (see below)! I absolutely love the atmosphere and the food is amazing. It was wonderful to start the day off connecting with my husband over coffee and eggs. 

The last few weeks have been rich because I have seen the fulfillment of my heart's desires and prayers answered. I have desired to do college ministry ever since I was a sophomore in college. There were so many walks on the beach in Santa Barbara sharing with God about this deep desire....countless journal pages filled of prayers regarding this desire.....and 8 years of waiting and waiting and waiting on the Lord (still learning to develop patience).

Hebrews 13 says, "may He equip you with what you need for doing His will" (v.21). As I look back over my 8 year journey to arrive at seeing the fulfillment of this deep desire, I am in awe of God's faithfulness in knowing exactly how I needed to be equipped for this position. While getting a Master's degree in Student Affairs was an obvious component of the equipping, I never would have guessed that most of my training came through walking through a season of Depression, working through my issues of perfectionism, being humbled to learn my identity is not found in my external achievements, a painful breakup, struggling with vocation when Seminary wasn't the right fit, learning to walk in freedom from body image struggles...that all of these painful experiences have equipped me to enter into the suffering of college students and to be present to them. 

3 years ago, I applied for a residence life position right out of graduate school. Unfortunately, I did not have any experience in residence life and therefore, got my first NO. Although painful at the time, in retrospect, I am able to recognize that I would not have been able to authentically enter into the pain of college students as I lacked the personal experience. How can you have true compassion for students' anxiety about the future, when at the point, all of "my plans" had always worked out perfectly? How do you guide students on an internal journey in finding their identity as the Beloved when at that point, my external achievements were my primary source of confidence? Depression is a serious issue among college students today and until more recently, I would have had no idea how to faithfully companion someone in a darker season of life. 3 years ago, I struggled to believe that God actually knew the desires of my heart and that He had good plans for me. I just felt abandoned and rejected. 

Today, I can't stop thanking God for these experiences because He has used it all for good in that I am able to relate with the students that I am journeying with. I feel "qualified" for my job, not because I have a Master's degree, but because I am broken, have been broken, and know that I am desperate, utterly desperate for Jesus. My dependence on Christ is my greatest strength.

James and I have each made a list of 5 things that we are focusing on for 2011 and one of my mine is daily practicing gratitude. Its easier to thank God for past experiences once we have experienced how He uses them for good. However, if we believe that God makes all things work together for our good, why not praise Him in the moment for the closed doors, the NO's, and the humbling experiences?

I pray that God would give us eyes to see the ways that He chooses to equip us as He is a good God and is the Creator of our heart's deepest desires and therefore, takes great delight in fulfilling them!

Something of significance...

I wanna be something of significance...

I want to do something worth remembering. I want to say something worth repeating. I want my life to be about something that years from now people will tell stories of. Do you ever wonder what makes a legend? Are they born or are they bred? Are they chosen or do they choose?

I have often considered myself a dreamer, but over the past year or two, ever since entering "the real world" I have found myself having to fight in order to keep the dreams alive. The dreams are what make us excited to live. The dreams are not what get us through the day, but the proof that there is something worth getting through for.

I am beginning to see why so many people settle down and begin building their lives around a nuclear location and simple purpose of building a family. This too is something I feel will be a large part of my life. The cause is noble, it is not easy, not usually glamorous, and I do believe that it is well worth it.

And yet, there is a part of me that I have vowed to never disown, it's the part of me that keeps me sane... it's my deep conviction that there is only one James Racine in the world, and God has crafted me for a specific purpose. Call it a call, call it a mission, call it a vocation or call it a destiny.

“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes "Awww!” -Jack Kerouac

I have collected quotes along the way of my journey. These words from deep souls before me remind me to "Never give up. Never give up. Never, never never.  (a commencement speech by Churchill in it's entirety) These words, from profound people, remind me that I am not the first, nor do I hope to be the last, dreamer.

Just this last week while spending time with my beautiful, supportive and equally "dreamy" of a wife at the Morton Arboretum Library, I found myself walking around perusing the books. Most of the books covered topics of agriculture, horticulture, ecosystems and environments. However, one set of books, not unfamiliar to me caught my attention.... no, rather, they caught me off guard and unprepared. Upon the top shelf, just out of my reach, I saw hard cover copies of Charles Darwin's Origin of the Species. The books, in that moment laid on that shelf like the Ark of The Covenant in the Raiders of The Lost Ark. Suddenly I was reminded of these mere "words" that had caused a literal international crisis and hysteria. Ranging from the supreme court to the high church councils, the words and thoughts penned by Charles Darwin would forever change the course of history, convincing some to renounce their faith, some to open up their GOD-shaped boxes, and others to divorce the notions of the science community all together. Still today, schools are in a tizzy as to what they should, can, could, need to and believe they should teach the impressionable minds of students.

What was spoken to me through this experience was something I had heard many times before, but had almost forgotten about completely...

“Words are sacred. They deserve respect. If you get the right ones in the right order you can nudge the world a little.” - Tom Stoppard

Oh, that I might live the life God has designed for me so that when I speak and when I write, my words would be considered something... sacred.

In Rest and Quietness....

(Katie) James and I are spending the morning at the Morton Arboretum's library. Its a beautiful and peaceful place to start the day. Living in the burbs, the Arboretum has become a refuge for us as we both love wide open spaces and nature. Spring semester has started and so I am grateful for some solitude to reflect since it always seems that the day flys by quickly.

One of the highlights of this past weekend was spending Saturday night with Andrea and Aron Mason and Lauren Caudell and Randall Rosen (recently engaged)! We enjoyed a Mexican themed dinner and spent 4 hours sharing stories about engagement/married life (lots of good laughs), recapping 2010, and sharing our dreams for 2011. Its a gift to spend time with couples who are full of JOY..who are willing to get real and be vulnerable about life... and who are passionate about desiring to look more like Christ in every aspect of their life. The night ended with us taking time to pray specifically for each couple. It was a powerful time of  speaking words of life over each other. I am grateful to spend Wednesday nights this upcoming year with friends who challenge James and I to be radical receivers and invite us to fully embrace this season of rest without the pressure of leading or pouring out. One of the life giving words that I received that night was Isaiah 30: 15:

“In returning and rest you shall be saved;

in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.”

When Andrea spoke these powerful words over me, they resonated deep in my Spirit. So, I decided to study this passage to better understand the context into which God was speaking. Isaiah 30 begins with God rebuking those in Judah who are putting their trust in Egypt instead of God. When Assyria attacked Judah, the people were fearful and did not trust that the God would protect them and so they formed an alliance with Egypt to get help. Listen to how Isaiah describes the situation: 

"Ah, rebellious children,” declares the Lord,

“who carry out a plan, but not mine,

and who make an alliance, but not of my Spirit,that they may add sin to sin; 2 who set out to go down to Egypt,

without asking for my direction, to take refuge in the protection of Pharaoh

and to seek shelter in the shadow of Egypt. 

Rebellious children, carrying out their own plan, making their own alliance, taking their own direction. Isaiah just held up a brutal mirror. I see myself all over these verses. I am more at risk of being guilty of these types of rebellion because I am well educated and financially secure. My knowledge and resources can enable me to believe that I don't actually need God's help. However, God is gracious and even in the midst of my prideful, hardened heart and disobedience, God's heart towards me is always one of "Return to Me." My strength is not found in our culture's obsession with independence, but in recognizing my need for God and returning to my dependence on Him. 

Isaiah also says that quietness shall be your strength. I am not naturally a very quiet person. I know that in quietness, I can hear the still small voice of the Lord. He encourages me in my weakness, quiets my fears, and gives me hope. However, most of the time I resist quietness to distract myself having to focus on my weaknesses or fears. This verse challenges me to consider the ratio of how much I am speaking compared to listening to God. 

Here are some wonderful words from Henri Nouwen (thanks Brooke!):

“When we enter into solitude to be with God alone, we quickly discover how dependent we are. Without the many distractions of our daily lives, we feel anxious and tense. When nobody speak to us, calls on us, or needs our help, we start feeling like nobodies. Then we begin wondering whether we are useful, valuable, and significant. Our tendency is to leave this fearful solitude quickly and get busy again to reassure ourselves that we are ‘somebodies.’ But that is a temptation, because what makes us somebodies is not other people’s responses to us but God’s eternal love for us."

Finally, there is a strong correlation between trust andrest for me. When I trust God, I can fully rest. The peace of God guards my heart and mind when I am rest. Therefore, I am finding its important to start paying attention to when I am fearful and anxious and to consider what I need from God that I am not trusting Him to provide. Hopefully this question will deter me from seeking refuge and protection from anyone or thing other than God!

Clothed in Compassion

(Katie) 


As I mentioned in my previous blog, I spent the last week in Arizona with my family. For the first time, our circle of 5 expanded to a circle of 8 to include James, John, and Taylor. I feel blessed in that our circle is rich with the addition of these quality, godly men. I don't know many men that can navigate our female dominated family's banter and singing escapades...deep, intentional conversation about matters of the heart...and our competitive love of games and all athletic endeavors. Not an easy combination!  Throughout the week, I enjoyed observing and engaging in conversations with my sisters about why they admired and were attracted to their significant other. The joys of being in love!


James and I also celebrated 5 months of marriage on Christmas Day. The busyness of Christmas unfortunately did not always bring out the best in me. 5 months into marriage, I am learning that James has committed his life to a woman who may be ideal in some areas AND he has committed his life to an imperfect being. Both are true. The Bible says that "there is no righteous person on earth who does right and never sins" (Ecclesiastes 7:20). Therefore, the reality is that we can expect failure from even the best people in our life. 


So the question becomes "what then?" What do you when your spouse fails you in some way or is less than you wish for them to be? What happens when she has a weakness or a failure? What about an unresolved childhood issue that they bring into the relationship?


Other than denial, we can choose to beat up our spouse for their imperfections or we can love it out of them. The Bible says that "love covers a multitude of sins" ( I Peter 4:18). The truth is that no failing is larger than grace. No hurt exists that love cannot heal. Nothing can permanently destroy a relationship as long as forgiveness and repentance are in the picture.


As someone who holds myself to extremely high standards and has a loud internal critic, I am realizing how often I wrongly project my own standards onto James.  I am learning that I  must learn to forgive what is inferior to my "ideal" standard. When we begin to think that we are "above" someone else's sin, we are in BIG trouble. I think the more we are familiar with our own sin and recognize our own desperate need for grace, the more we are able to extend grace to others.


I absolutely struggle with pride and can find myself believing the lie that I am a superior person. However, this is not the case. I am James' wife, not his judge. I am called to enter into the healing process. Even if I am in a stronger position, God never uses His power to hurt or to inflict guilt or shame. He uses His strength to extend compassion, love, grace, and forgiveness. As Paul states, we are invited to "clothe ourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience" (Col 3:13). 


Instead of hardening our hearts every time we are disappointed with someone, what if we chose to clothe ourselves with kindness, compassion, humility, gentleness, and patience? 


Hardness of heart is the true relationship killer. As Jesus said, failure is not the cause of divorce, hardness of heart is (Matthew 19:8). Therefore, tenderheartedness is imperative.


I came across this quote from another hero of mine, Jean Vanier:

 
"To be in communion is to be with someone and to realize that we actually belong together. Communion means accepting people as they are with all their limits and inner pain, but also with their gifts of their beauty and their capacity to grow, to see the beauty inside all the pain…To love someone is to reveal to them their capacities for life, the light that is shining in them…We are a Eucharistic people which means we are a people of thanksgiving who realize we are prodigal sons and daughters.”

May we enter this new year as people clothed in compassion, humility, gentleness, and patience. 

ESTABLISHED 2011

"Behold, I lay in Zion a stone for a foundation, a tried stone, a precious cornerstone, a sure foundation" (Isaiah 28:16)

(Katie) James and I welcomed 2011 in Arizona. We felt very blessed to spend 4 uninterrupted days together (and with my family) reflecting, hiking, playing tennis, biking, eating exquisite food, resting, and appreciating the breathtaking mountains that surrounded us. Needless to say, it was a much welcomed Selah to our busy schedule in Wheaton.

James and I hiked Pinnacle Peak one morning and we decided to hike in silence, taking time to pray into what God wants us to focus on for 2011. I continue to be amazed by God's faithfulness and how He unites James and I when we intentionally take time to seek His vision in prayer. As a verbal processor, silence is not always the easiest thing for me. When we finished the hike, James spoke about being "established" and I talked about building a "foundation." Thus, our theme for 2011 is establishing a sure foundation!

Isaiah 28 describes the process of a tried stone becoming a sure foundation. Prior to our Selah in Arizona, I felt like James and I were being tried: finals + minimal sleep + 10 days straight of working + 2 busy days at Christmas + 5 days a part = a perfect storm. When I am exhausted and overextended, I really struggle to stand firm in faith, secure, against lies. I believe that Satan tries very hard to tempt me to come into agreement with lies that often feel true but are not. Once I buy into the lie and make agreement with it, they begin to influence my interpretation of reality and certainly color how I see myself and others. 

Perhaps some of these agreements sound familiar:

It's just not going to get any better.

Don't rock the boat; settle for what you've got.

Its not worth the effort; don't give it one more try.

Never let anyone hurt you again.

I'm just not going to trust them anymore.

I'd be happier with someone else.

I'm not doing enough; I am not enough.

If I were a better woman, he would be happy.

I will never be understood.

Before any of us can establish a sure foundation, we must first recognize the places that we have come into agreement with lies, thus building on sand. For me, I have found it helpful to spend time asking the following questions (these are specific to marriage):

Lord, what are the agreements I have been making about my marriage?

What are the agreements that I have been making about love?

What are the agreements that I have been making about my spouse?

To have Christ reveal those agreements to you will be absolutely mind blowing. Once we recognize these agreements, we must renounce them and replace them with Truth.

As James and I reflected on the truths that we want to lay in the sure foundation of our marriage, we came up with the list below.

I am loved. Deeply and truly loved. (Jeremiah 31:3)

I am secure. Utterly and completely secure. (John 10:28)

I am forgiven. Totally forgiven. (Colossians 2:13)

God is with me. He will never abandon me. (Hebrews 13:4)

All of these truths point us back to Christ. As individuals, we both must renew our minds with the Truth above. My marriage cannot be the primary place that I look to for happiness, intimacy, and validation. The greatest gift we can give to our marriage is for both of us to continue to pursue a real relationship with Jesus. 

One of my favorite moments in Arizona was sitting in the hot tub, dreaming together about the future. Discovering the dreams and desires that God has given me and sharing them as a couple is one of the most romantic things that I have ever experienced. I continue to be in awe of God bringing James and I together: our experiences, our unique desires, our spiritual gifts, and our talents...for a future that God is calling us to. However, we can only administrate the shared vision that God has given us if we have a solid, sure foundation. Here's to 2011, a year of establishing a sure foundation for our marriage!

Hi katie!